Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Blood's Thicker Than Water, Ye Know

Nowhere in all the world, except for the hills and hollers of the Allegheny
Mountains will you hear such phrases as "He's kin to ye," or "She's over
yonder." Maybe, it is because up until about 50 or 60 years ago, the roads
leading in to the hills and hollers of places like West Virginia were not
the best to travel on, keeping those who live there in a bit of isolation.
Maybe, it's because children just naturally pick up on their parents
expressions. Whatever the reason, on any given day, when I was a teenager, I
was told, "Ye can't date that boy, 'cause he's kin to ye." I grew up hearing
expressions like, "I'll git to it dreckly." (directly). And, speaking of kin
folk, I'm related to a lot of people. In fact, the pictures that you see
here were taken of me with some of my family, the Adkinses.

On Saturday, August 22 around 1:00PM, the man who was my biological father,
Bill Adkins passed away. I am the oldest of four girls by him. My sisters,
Janisa, Britany and Jenny are younger and scattered about the US. Janisa and
Britany along with many other family members traveled to meet here in WV for
the services and to see family they hadn't seen in a long time. And, what a
reunion it was. It was so good to meet my sisters that I had not seen since
1990, the day I first met Bill Adkins. We exchanged phone numbers and
promises to keep in touch.

The funeral was yesterday, and let me say that it was one of the hardest
ones I had ever been to. Raw grief is pitiful to witness, but when you're
kin to them, it's even worse. I didn't know Bill AKA Billy as well as the
others, but still I couldn't hide my emotions inside, when everyone else was
having such a rough time of it. I don't feel betrayed, I have no regrets; I
know I did all I could to make him know he was welcome in my life. But, it's
my sisters who needed more from him.

To be perfectly honest, it's hard putting my thoughts about everything in to
words, but I think I summed it up yesterday when I told my husband, "If only
Billy could have been alive to see his own funeral, it might have changed
his ways, seeing all the love poured out for him." We will just never know.

So, when it comes to your kin folk, take nothing for granted, take advantage
of every moment you have with them, and forgive their tresspasses; they
aren't perfect, after all, but they are your kin.

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